The Expectation Dilemma

1) Stop Expecting You From Other People:

We all know that we have suffered the most aren’t we reader? Yes, you got that right. Setting up expectations poorly. Most of us can’t set that right so most of the time that’s why we are having a little hard time with others and with ourselves. We have our rights and wrongs, our experiences, and our ways to learn happiness, commitment, loyalty, and the value of honesty but also anger, betrayal, sadness. Those are all coming from how we have learned things from other people. Breaking down and understand everything in different perspectives about this is vital and important.

2) Expecting something to happen won’t make it happen:

It’s not a secret we are all falling for the Idea of Law of Attraction. In a classical sense; that means we attract what we want or put our thoughts into. In that, sometimes we just expect things to run out on themselves. But to expect something to happen on our way, we need to put the work in, we need to make efforts for it to expect something to happen. One of our favorite quotes about it is. “A goal without a plan is just a wish.” We always should work for what we want. Even plan through it. Set up short and long term goals into it and make them happen. We agreed that wishing that, putting good thoughts and positivity on what we work on leading on things eventually. (that’s what we choose to believe.) So long story short, it’s like a combination. 2 pieces of the whole. Do work and put your good thoughts and good expectations should exist at the same time to expect something to happen.

That’s on side of it. The other side of it is, setting expectations on People.

We as individuals, intend to have expectations for people. From our families and friends and co-workers. Problems occur when the expectations and reality haven’t matched. The right way to approach this is, unless you have good reasons to believe our expectations can or will be fulfilled, we shouldn’t raise our hopes over people.

As stated by Psychology Today article “The Psychology of Expectations”,

“A member of a couple might expect others to make a coffee, but if the other person has no interest in living up to that expectation, the one that expects will morally indignant and resentful.”

3) Don’t put more expectations for yourself more than you can accomplish:

To overcome this, you need to understand yourself and how you accomplish things, motivational sources alongside with time and resources you have in what you want to accomplish. Along the way, we are seeing a lot of individuals that have a lot of potentials and a got used to being successful and when they don’t accomplish the expectations that they set up for themselves, they can get frustrated and not being very personable or simply you can just see how down they can get.

Success is something you can’t let go once you get a taste of it. You just simply don’t let that feeling go and the first step of success it mentally prepare yourself for what you up against and put goals for you to accomplish. Once you started to overcome the hardships, solve problems, and start to achieve things, your self-confidence gets build up, you are aiming for bigger and work harder.

If you don’t follow that order and when you are taking baby steps, you shouldn’t expect yourself to run. First, you have to learn how to walk, and then walk rapidly, get comfortable with it and then you should consider running. We intend to go big once we started to get the essence of success. But again, we need to hold our jets and move smoothly rather than aggressive.

4) If you don’t love yourself don’t expect to see love from others:

Everything we do, everything we engage, and everything we put ourselves require a reflection or a showcase of our character and self-respect, self-confidence, and most importantly the Self-love. We reflect those values that we have for ourselves. Self-love provides appreciation, determination, willingness to do sacrifice when it’s needed, show kindness, and care for the people in our lives.

Self-love is a power that we all must have in order NOT to seek external approval or expect others to provide what we don’t provide for ourselves. Self-love is sustainable and the source that will long last. If you don’t do that, you will always depend on others and once you don’t receive that, you will feel down and sad.

Choose to love yourself first to be the better version of yourself and to be able to establish healthy relationships with others and the motivation for everything you are fighting with or against to fulfill your dreams.

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. — Buddha